Lingurita de Umor – ( 4 )

 1.When pupils are too smart :

TEACHER:    Maria, go to the map and find   North America  .        
MARIA:         Here it  is.
TEACHER:   Correct.  Now class, who discovered   America ?
CLASS:         Maria.

TEACHER:   John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN:          You told me to do it without using tables.

TEACHER:  Glenn, how do you spell ‘crocodile?’
GLENN:      K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L’
TEACHER:  No, that’s wrong
GLENN:       Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
(I  Love this child)

TEACHER:   Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD:     H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER:   What are you talking about?
DONALD:    Yesterday you said it’s H to O.

TEACHER:   Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago.
WINNIE:       Me!

TEACHER:   Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN:          Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.

TEACHER:     Millie, give me a sentence starting with ‘  I.  ‘
MILLIE:         I  is..
TEACHER:     No, Millie….. Always say, ‘I  am.’
MILLIE:         All right…  ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’

TEACHER:    George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted it.
Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?
LOUIS:           Because George still had the axe in his hand….

TEACHER:    Now, Simon , tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON:         No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook.

TEACHER:       Clyde , your composition on ‘My Dog’ is exactly the same as your brother’s… Did you copy his?
CLYDE  :         No, sir. It’s the same dog.
(I want to adopt this kid!!!)

TEACHER:    Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD:     A teacher.

2.When teachers are too smart :

Registry on the first day back at school in Birmingham, ENGLAND .
The teacher began calling out the names of the pupils:

„Mustafa Al Eih Zeri?” „Here”
„Achmed El Kabul?” „Here”
„Fatima Al Hayek? ” „Here”
„Ali Abdul Olmi?” „Here”
„Mohammed Bin Kadir?” „Here”
„Ali Son al En” – silence in the classroom .
„Ali Son al En” – continued silence as everyone looked around the room .

The teacher repeated the call. A girl stood up and said :  „Sorry teacher. I think that’s me.  It’s pronounced Alison Allen.”